New games suck
Posted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 12:24 am
Every Sunday I get a list of upcoming games. I tend to enter them into the website on a Monday that tends to fall about six months later. Well, let's paly catch-up.
Super Scribblenauts - I'm not going to say this thing is gonna be bad or anything, but you could put TurdMaker 3000 on the DS and it'd sell a mint. Wait, they did that already. A lot.
Fable III - Hopefully this'll live up to the promise Peter Molyneux made. For Fable I. I'm mostly just expecting a lot of gay sex and a below-average action-RPG.
Fallout New Vegas - From the description... "Welcome to Vegas. New Vegas. It’s the kind of town where you dig your own grave prior to being shot in the head and left for dead…and that’s before things really get ugly." Actually, they're getting New Vegas mixed up with the old one. This one probably doesn't have a ton of gold-digging Koreans in clubs, though.
WWE Smackdown vs. Raw 2011 - How do you spot closet case white trash? They request this.
Sims 3 - At last, Electronic Arts can finally wet themselves for joy. DLC is here for consoles and so is the new Sims. This one will drop you into a white room for the tutorial, then give you a ball on a string and perpetual motion machine to play with. Then you're going to realize you have to pay real money for each ground tile, floor tile, walling unit, and bit of genital.
Time Crisis: Razing Storm - How do you piss off Wii fanboys? You point out that the Move is virtually the same thing. You're going to have to put up with at least three minutes of listening to reasons it's not, but the both of you will know that deep in the other person's heart, there's a large spiderweb crack that just got widened.
Naruto Ultim oh screw this waste of space.
Rock of the Dead - If you listen closely, you can hear the sound of game developer Tommo giving up.
Super Scribblenauts - I'm not going to say this thing is gonna be bad or anything, but you could put TurdMaker 3000 on the DS and it'd sell a mint. Wait, they did that already. A lot.
Fable III - Hopefully this'll live up to the promise Peter Molyneux made. For Fable I. I'm mostly just expecting a lot of gay sex and a below-average action-RPG.
Fallout New Vegas - From the description... "Welcome to Vegas. New Vegas. It’s the kind of town where you dig your own grave prior to being shot in the head and left for dead…and that’s before things really get ugly." Actually, they're getting New Vegas mixed up with the old one. This one probably doesn't have a ton of gold-digging Koreans in clubs, though.
WWE Smackdown vs. Raw 2011 - How do you spot closet case white trash? They request this.
Sims 3 - At last, Electronic Arts can finally wet themselves for joy. DLC is here for consoles and so is the new Sims. This one will drop you into a white room for the tutorial, then give you a ball on a string and perpetual motion machine to play with. Then you're going to realize you have to pay real money for each ground tile, floor tile, walling unit, and bit of genital.
Time Crisis: Razing Storm - How do you piss off Wii fanboys? You point out that the Move is virtually the same thing. You're going to have to put up with at least three minutes of listening to reasons it's not, but the both of you will know that deep in the other person's heart, there's a large spiderweb crack that just got widened.
Naruto Ultim oh screw this waste of space.
Rock of the Dead - If you listen closely, you can hear the sound of game developer Tommo giving up.